Does she really like me, Im so confused :( ?

This is lengthy but i'll try to keep it short as possible. Alright I met this girl 2 years ago, the first year I had an extreme crush on her, but come this year we started talking "A LOT" every day. thousands and thousands of text a week, and collected hundreds of hours over the phone with her. She knew how I felt for her very yearly on of this year. And she told me she really liked me, However she didn't wanna start dating right now. Well, being the gentle-man I am, I respected her decision and gave her some time. Well it's been 10 months of hearing the same thing over and over again. With ever changing reasons. To be quite honest I have fallen madly in love with this girl. to the point I hate looking at other girls, because I feel guilty or something. And I think about her night and day!! "NON-LUSTFULLY" I have shared and opened my heart to her many of times, and let her know I love her everyday. " I try to keep it less creepy as possible" Anyways she tells me she is in love with me. "Yes IN-Love with me" Yet in all this time of flirting and talking, she still doesn't want to date me? If she loved me like she says she does, she wouldn't care about these stupid, useless reason not to date, and would just give me a chance right? Recently I got an "unknown" friend to do some questioning for me. One of the questions was "Why do you like being single"? Her response to him was: Because I like it that way.Me and another buddy pondered over this for a few hours. We came to the conclusion she said this because she likes the attention of being single. We think this because, guys flirt with her left and right. (she tells me about it and follows with " Yea, I don't like him" and starts flirting with me again.. until she brings up some new band she likes with a sexy singer or new movie with yet another sexy actor. Friends tell me to date other people, and I did try this about 5 months ago. However I couldn't do it, because the whole time I was thinking about her. I later told her about the date, and ever since she acts like she hates the girl. same way with any girl that talks to me. So I don't even talk to other girls for her, yet she can talk to other guys and flirt with them. And believe me..there is a lot of them. I don't know if it helps but I'll share a little about myself. I have always been single, I have been asked out and chased after girls, but never accepted there hearts. I never found myself attractive to them or enjoyed being around them. For the longest time I thought I was aromantic, until I met this girl. Yes this means I have never kissed a girl, or ever had sexual encounters with anyone or feelings. In my life time I gone through many hardships that were the cause of women. All the male role models in my life have been drove insane and been put through pain because of women. Suicides did happen... My mother was a crack addict , and never gave interest in me and put me down a lot, threatening to kill me, and send me away meany times, and would tell me i'd grow up to be a wife beater and a useless bum. these things were told to me at the ages 6 through 15. So I not only did i not find women attractive, but didn't trust or like them at all. I thought about being gay once, but I don't find man attractive either. and my religion "Christianity" Frowns on it. <- though if I liked men, I wouldn't care, I'd go gay. But I don't. Anyways "off-topic" This girl has changed everything for me, I don't feel like a freak anymore, and finally I feel like I can open my heart to someone. But with this knew found feeling of "love" which I now know a thousand different definitions for, has come this pain. It's unbearable :'( I have never cryed for a girl until this one, never been so jealous, never been so willing to do anything to win someones heart until her. And I just don't know what to do or who to ask or where to turn. Can someone please help me, i am at the end of my rope here. If you would like more details to better answer my question PLEASE PLEASE email me! Thank you so much for reading this far, even if you don't answer my question, it feels better that someone this. (p.s: I have talked to her about how I love her and wanna be with her, and about my jealousy, and pain. Nothing seemed to change.)